“Let’s go to Costco!” I said to Jason on Saturday. I looked at myself. I was dressed in something other than my house work uniform, my hair was brushed, and I was actually wearing makeup. It was definitely a day to go out on the town. I said, “We can go look around, get samples, (yes we’re free loaders) and then get the kids pizza and ice cream!” Jason liked the idea and we were all in the van headed to Costco just a few minutes later.
Costco was just as crowded as it ever is just an hour and a half before closing on a Saturday, but we weren’t going to let it bother us. I mean come on we were out of the house! We were merrily looking around and tasting some delicious food pushing and shoving our way in and out of the aisles. The girls wanted some granola bar samples but there were way too many people so Jason left me, mid aisle, with all four kids. He came back with one for everyone except me so I walked back over to get one. “Oh good there’s one left!” The lady looked at me with big round eyes and said, “Yeah a man just came and took SIX of them!” I must not have done a very good job of concealing my thoughts because she then said, “Maybe he was your husband!”
The kids were starting to get whiney and the lines were getting longer so we headed over to check out. Trying to save time, I decided I should go wait in the food line. At Costco if you don’t carry cash you have to order your food in the regular line and then go wait in the food line to get your meal. “Don’t forget to order the food and use the coupons.” I yelled over my shoulder as I carried Baby Jason, pulled on Faith’s hand, and headed to wait in the food line. Pretty soon I was near the counter and Jason wasn’t back yet. I let one…two…three…five people go ahead of me. It was getting embarrassing. Finally I realized Jason was no where in sight. “Well my husband disappeared.” I told the lady as I walked away from my cherished spot.
Jason had forgotten to get his shampoo that we had coupons for and I found him once again at the back of a checkout line. Back I go to the food line. I wizened up though and this time kept a good eye on him to make sure I didn’t lose him again. Pretty soon he was up to the cashier and I watched as he pushed Grace and Joy down one side where they swipe the food items, and he walked around to the other side to pay, leaving our two angels to fend for themselves with no immediate accountability. Joy was grabbing the food and standing up and sitting down. Grace found a divider and merrily placed it on the food belt. It was taking Jason a long time to pay, and I was again at the front letting people by me. Sure enough, instead of gallantly running to me with the receipt, rescuing my front of the line position, he went and got in yet another cashier line. “Faith dear I don’t believe it but Dad’s not coming.” Again I forfeited my spot in line and walked over to where Jason was waiting. “What happened?” Grace had placed the divider in between our pile of stuff so Jason had only paid for half of the items. Which is why it had taken him so long to pay, but when he paid for the second set of stuff he forgot to use the coupons AND forgot to order the food! Finally they reimbursed him for the coupons, and he paid for our food and shoved his three receipts in his pocket.
“Jason I’ll sit here with the kids while you get the food. I’m embarrassed to go stand up there again.” No problem, that was fine with him. As I watched from my nice comfy seat with three girls trying to do gymnastics on the benches, I noticed that he was at the end of a long line but there was no one in the second line. I yelled, “There’s no one in the second line!” He looks around and yells back, “There isn’t another line.” I’m shaking my head vigorously while all the people behind him run and get in the other line. “Well you told everyone else!” He yelled back at me. I thought that was hilarious in spite of everything. While Jason was getting the food Joy decided to have a total melt down. By the time Jason delivered the food, it was time to take a trip out to the van with Joy. We uncomfortably gulped down our food. Jason Jr. (who I was still nursing at the time) decided it was way past his meal time and he was letting everyone know it. I’d had enough to eat and the younger two girls had lost their ice cream privilege by their bad behavior so I told Jason to enjoy his ice cream with Faith and I’d take the rest to the van and feed the baby.
A little while later I looked out the window and saw Jason and Faith RUNNING to the van. “Enjoy your ice cream?” I asked when he got near. He got that funny look in his eye. When he was leaving the store, he explained, he could only find two of the three receipts he had for all the loot in the cart. So he had shampoo that it appeared he was trying to smuggle out of the store. He tried to explain to the lady all he had gone through, but the unsympathetic woman just told him to stand aside and wait for a supervisor. Well Jason had had enough. He handed her the receipts and yelled, “You verify it with your supervisor!” as he took off running to the van. I think that the next time I get a bright idea…I’ll do it anyway just to see what happens!
Hilarious! I love this post! Oh, can I relate! Though I think you have me beat. I just wrote about shopping today too, without the family. I think you may need to follow my lead. 🙂
Oh my goodness!! That sounds like something that would happen to us as well!!
Skyler Ashley says
Hahaha! xD I wish he’d gotten a snapshot of that lady’s face as she watched him run out with everything she hadn’t verified!! haha! Too funny.
kelli zaniel says
That’s so real, that’s why I like it so much! Well, at least you had your make-up on …had you not been showered it could have been worse! Yep just another lovely day with the fam at the grocery store!:) My man usually does the shopping on Fridays after work…I love that!!
So he just ran out?! LOL! I love it! I wouldn’t have had the guts to do that.
When I have clean hair, cute clothes, and make-up on, I love to find places to go. =)
Cara R. says
ROFLOL, Esther! We were in Sam’s yesterday after church. DH and two of the kids were sitting at a snack table drinking soda, while I shopped with our 7 1/2 year old (who looks 4 because he is so small). Well, he decided to ditch me. I didn’t freak out because I was pretty sure he headed straight for the others. (And, sure enough, he did.) But, when I saw his brother (11) wandering around, I asked, “Have you seen ‘G’?” No. A woman walked by just as I facetiously said, “Well, that BRAT ditched me!” She gave me the strangest look. I’m sure she thought that I was talking about someone else’s child (Why would I call my own child a brat?) and was horrified that I didn’t seem to care that a child in MY care had run off. *giggle*
We like to “forage” for free samples too. Except DD, who is 16, often can’t get any by herself because they think she is TWELVE! I told her to just whip out her driver’s permit next time that happens. ;oP
Hahahahaha… I am only laughing because we have been there! Thank you so much for sharing, I was starting to think that these things only happened to us. Sound like you took it all in stride, so proud of you! I was just stopping by from “Marriage Mondays” over at Come Have a Peace, really enojed your post!
oh my gosh. I would never take my husband anywhere ever again!!!
Great post Esther….loved the part about the house work uniform! I used to call my clothes my uniform as well…haha 🙂
Sis you can make anyone laugh I give you that…I love eating the food that they have for you to sample. A person can get filled if they eat to much…Now what type of uniform do you wear in the house? (LOL) I wear shorts and tee short..I get hott to fast these days. Could be because I am going through the change…(LOL)
Ha ha ha, that was quite the shopping trip! We go and try the samples at Sam’s Club, yummy!
Oh my goodness! That sounds insane! Even when it’s just my husband and I, a trip to Sam’s can be crazy. I can’t even imagine what it’ll be like with kids in tow!
I feel ya girl! This is how ALL of my shopping trips go. I LOATHE shopping with four kids. UGH! At least you still have your sense of humor, right?
Very funny shopping trip!
I love how many times he went through the check out lines…and LOVE that he ran away from the lady with the receipts! Haha…whenever they check mine I always think they aren’t looking close enough to even tell how many items I purchased! lol.
So the tip is DON’T go with a hubs and family. 🙂
You really need to videotape outings like this. 🙂 You could seriously win some cash for this! Maybe next time bring a Costco pizza home and watch a movie … not nearly as eventful, but maybe less stressful. 🙂
Oh my goodness, how hilarious! We don’t have any club memberships, and I think it’s partly because every time we’ve been (with somebody who does) it just seems like such a huge ordeal.
I love that he ran off before getting “the okay”!
I knew it…bunch of delinquents!
That was HILLARIOUS!! I have had similiar experiences and have learned to leave everyone at home…LOL. One thing I heave learned is to NEVER go to Costco on a weekend…it’s Crazy! Thanks for the laugh.
Susan Evans says
What a fun story!
The Messy Mom says
I could totally see this happening to my family. We love to have a night out at Costco (who doesn’t?) That is hilarious and I am worn out just from the thought of it all.
This cracks me up! Costco is our weekend outting of choice, as well. Possibly because one cart will hold a larger fraction of our children than any other store.
Costco on a Saturday is a huge accomplishment–especially with the whole family! Nice work.
Funny! I have only one and go crazy half the time! I can’t imagine 4!! LOL 🙂 I am your newest follower from MBC! I hope you will follow back!
I have to say that you made me laugh out loud with this. Being one of seven children, I can remember many a day where our family was put into situations like this. But, it sounds like you and Jason do a good job of trying to keep your cool and managing your kids meltdowns when things don’t go as planned. Have a great weekend!
Visiting from Serenity Now.
Amanda @ Serenity Now says
Yep, that sounds like Costco to me! 😉 My girls love going for the free samples because we are also freeloaders. 😉 Ha! I didn’t know you could pay for food at the check out line!! I wonder if it is like that at my Costco too???
Thank you so much for joining my Weekend Bloggy Reading party. 🙂
P V Ariel says
Hi nice to be here again with your wonderful and smiling family.
Great blog and great expressions
Wishes to all at this smiling fly.
Too funny! I despise shopping of any kind, so these stories crack me up!
So, so funny. I really enjoyed this post. It makes me feel better for all the crazy shopping trips that we have had!
Theresa Suttles says
Oh, I love it! This sounds so much like us when we had five small kids. Every trip out of the house was an adventure.
That was too funny! I enjoy reading your blog!
This is one of my all time favorites! Glad you enjoyed it. 🙂 Thanks so much for stopping by!