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My First Near-Death Experience

Exactly a week after I had given birth to Faith, my first baby, my mother-in-law came to help me.  I am convinced now that Kathy was sent from God.  Pretty soon after she arrived, I noticed that I was bleeding heavier, and I remember asking her about it.  I called my sister and my mom and asked them if it was normal to still be bleeding so heavily a week after the baby was born.  Having no idea how much I was bleeding, they all said it wasn’t unusual.  I tried to take it easy after Kathy got there, but I was becoming increasingly weak and concerned about the bleeding.  My husband went out to mow the lawn, and as I walked across the house, things began to go black.  I thought that might be a pretty good sign that I should call the doctor!  I recounted my symptoms to the doctor on call, and I distinctly remember his answer: “No, this is NOT normal.  Get to the emergency room now or dial 911.”  I was hemorrhaging.  What is worse is that I had been hemorrhaging for six hours.  As Kathy went out to get my husband, I remember being more worried about leaving my baby than anything else!

When Jason heard what the doctor had said, he immediately picked me up and put me in the back seat of his car.  He said he could get me there faster than if we waited for the ambulance.  I had never seen so much fear on my husband’s face–he thought I was going to die.  He kept looking at me in the back seat to make sure I was still breathing, and I kept telling him that if he had a wreck he’d lose me for sure!  They were expecting me when we got to the hospital.  I was wheeled right in without having to wait around to fill out paper work.  A doctor saw me immediately.  I heard the doctors talking right outside my door, and a nurse said, “Something has got to be done about this one.”   My husband was sobbing when the doctor told us that he thought I was hemorrhaging from retained placenta and that they were going to take me into surgery to try to stop the bleeding.

I remember the whole surgery.  I begged them not to put me under because if they had, I wouldn’t have been able to nurse my baby.  I remember the faces of the doctors and nurses, and I remember trying to talk and joke with them.  When the surgery was over, they told me they had stopped the bleeding and that I was out of immediate danger, but that I had lost a lot of blood.

When I was finally transferred to a room, Kathy brought little Faith and took care of her for me through the night so that I could nurse her.  She really had her work cut out for her.  Faith screamed most of the night.  Kathy walked the halls with her, dodging complaints from angry patients.

All that night I writhed in pain in the hospital bed.  I had had third degree tears when my baby was born the week before, and with the surgery, the stitches had all ripped open and had to be re-stitched.  The nurses wouldn’t give me any medicine for the pain because they couldn’t reach my doctor to okay it!  Early the next morning my doctor came and was furious that no one had given me anything.

My pastor, a very happy and jolly kind of man, came to visit me.    When he saw me, he stopped short and kind of gasped.  “I must look really bad,” I thought to myself.  I had no idea!

Later that day the nurse got me up for the first time so that I could take a bath.  That’s when I saw myself.  My reaction mirrored that of my pastor.  I had no color unless you count gray.  I looked like death.

The nurse ran the bath water in the Jacuzzi tub.  She told me she was going to make it nice and warm so that I could relax–no matter that she was making it hotter than she was supposed to.  A hot bath did indeed sound wonderful.  She helped me into the tub, turned on the jets, and left the room.  The next thing I knew three nurses were lifting me out of the water.  I had fainted.  I fainted two more times on the way back to my hospital bed.

There was a lot of activity in my room then, and I remember I was losing my vision.  It was the strangest thing: I would look at the nurse, and her face looked like a puzzle with some of the pieces missing.  The doctor said this was because I had lost too much blood and ordered a transfusion.  I think they gave me three units.  The life was literally pumped into me, and within a couple of hours the color returned to my face.  I thought it was incredible!  I recovered quickly after that and was released to go home the next day.  I was so happy to once again be home with my husband and new baby, and I thanked the Lord for another chance to be able to live for Him!

The very next weekend we found ourselves once again at the hospital…

This event, among other things, led me to  begin writing and later to enjoy it.  I wanted my kids, should anything happen to me, to have something to remember me by.

Click here to read about this experience from my mom’s perspective.

Esther

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46 Comments Filed Under: Faith, Kids Tagged: bleeding, husband, sad, scary

Comments

  1. varunner7 says

    January 11, 2011 at 8:02 am

    How scary! And that’s awful you had to have surgery for it! I hemorrhaged after the twins. The pitocin they gave to try to stop the bleeding didn’t work so they had to go up in and clean me out to stop it. The doctor did this by hand, and I had the twins naturally so I didn’t have any pain meds in me. It was rough! It did work though, but for a while afterwards every time I stood up I’d pass out. It took me a few days to feel normal again because of the blood loss.

    Reply
  2. Danna says

    January 11, 2011 at 8:02 am

    That sounds terrifying Esther! I cannot even begin to imagine how painful that must have been, ouch! So happy to hear that you recovered so quickly. Praise!

    Reply
  3. Ken Barnes says

    January 11, 2011 at 8:13 am

    Boy, Esther for a little girl you sure have been thru a lot!When you’re old and gray, if you don’t have a book about you and your family, The world will have missed a lot.

    Reply
  4. Megan says

    January 11, 2011 at 8:46 am

    Oh my goodness! What a story! So glad for how it turned out!

    Reply
  5. MommyJ says

    January 11, 2011 at 9:04 am

    It’s when I hear stories like this that I am so grateful for modern medicine and all that they can do to heal our bodies these days. I wouldn’t have survived the delivery of my first child were it not for the miracles of modern medicine. It sounds like you probably wouldn’t have either. Just the other day, a friend of mine posted about her granddaughter, born with her intestines outside her body. And you know what? She’s recovering from surgery, performed just hours after her birth, and she’s going to be just fine. Miracle, isn’t it? Praise God for the miracles of science and medicine.

    Reply
  6. Sharon Henning says

    January 11, 2011 at 10:06 am

    What a story. Wow! What a wonderful reminder that all our days are numbered by God before time began. Another way of looking at that is to say, we’re immortal until GOD chooses to take us home.

    Reply
  7. Carly A. K. says

    January 11, 2011 at 10:20 am

    I don’t have time to write a full comment today, but your title intrigued me–your “first” near death experience? You mean you’ve had a second?! What an adventurous life you’ve lead!

    Reply
  8. Ruth says

    January 11, 2011 at 10:58 am

    Oh wow! I’m really glad you’re still here! =) Did you hemorrhage after any of your other babies? I tend to bleed extra heavy after a birth, so my midwife makes sure I’m pumped full of iron during my pregnancy, just to get my blood count up.

    Reply
  9. Warren Baldwin says

    January 11, 2011 at 11:02 am

    Wow, an amazing story. It is good you had family there to help you. God knew what he was doing when be blessed us with family. Faith-building post!

    Reply
  10. Robin says

    January 11, 2011 at 12:15 pm

    Well, you definitely can’t call your life dull – that’s for sure!

    Reply
  11. Carla says

    January 11, 2011 at 1:11 pm

    yeah, the blacking out would have scared me–I hate the thought of being unconscious. What are your other near-death stories?

    Reply
  12. Sarita Edgerton says

    January 11, 2011 at 1:25 pm

    I almost died during my last pregnancy. I lost all my blood. My husband said he had never seen someone with no color in her irises. I looked like a polka dotted cover on a white sheet(freckles and moles). I had to have 7 or 8 units of blood. They lost count. My dad walked into the ICU and without saying anything burst into tears and left. I had over 400 stitches inside my body and 12 staples going down my belly. Quite tragic! But we are both alive and well 3 years later!

    Reply
  13. Frieda says

    January 11, 2011 at 1:30 pm

    You said later that this experience made you decide to keep scrapbooks for your children and later encouraged you to write. So something good came of it. I’m not saying it was worth it, just that we can see some good.

    Reply
  14. Anne says

    January 11, 2011 at 2:39 pm

    Wow..that was some story. I can’t imagine not being put under during surgery.. that’s crazy. The Lord is always watching out for us though… to have had your mother in law there and your husband home at the same time is God’s protection for you.

    Reply
  15. Nancy says

    January 11, 2011 at 3:48 pm

    That was a close one, Esther! How scary it must have been. And your poor husband! I’m so glad everything turned out all right. 🙂

    Reply
  16. Elizabeth says

    January 11, 2011 at 4:07 pm

    So glad that you were all right. I had a similar experience after having an ovary removed. I was at home with my husband (but it was 2 weeks before our wedding) the night I was released from the hospital and I passed out from internal bleeding. I remember telling my husband I didn’t feel very good and calling my mom to see what she thought. All I got out was “I think somethings wrong” before I blacked out. The next thing I knew, I woke up in the ER with people all around me. Thank God for the medical technology that helped to save both of our lives!

    Reply
  17. Rachel says

    January 11, 2011 at 5:18 pm

    what a story! and this is only ONE of your near death experiences? cant wait to hear another..
    you are very brave to have surgery while awake that would scare me!

    Reply
  18. mrsmarkdave says

    January 11, 2011 at 6:32 pm

    OH MY GOODNESS!!!!!! I thought for sure I would be laughing at the end of this story. I assure you that I was not.
    What a sacrifice you made for your baby, too, not being willing to be put under for surgery. Esther, you may not think so, but you ARE an amazing woman!!!!

    Reply
  19. Lalas Pequenos says

    January 11, 2011 at 7:04 pm

    What an amazingly terrible thing to have happened!! Why did they let you get in a tub right after surgery?? I’m so glad you were ok!

    Reply
  20. Jenilee says

    January 12, 2011 at 9:57 am

    wow! what an incredible story of God’s hand on your life! people in the right place at the right time. God is so good! I’m glad everything worked out ok and that you were fine! thanks for linking up today!

    Reply
  21. Susan Evans says

    January 12, 2011 at 4:08 pm

    Wow, how scary! I know how horrible a third-degree tear can be. I also had no pain medication when my third degree tear was stitched up. I felt each stitch as it was going in and out. It was bad.

    Back in the hospital room, the nurse kept pushing my stomach, and I said, “It’s over! I’ve already given birth! Please stop hurting me!” She looked shocked and asked if I’d had pain killer, and I said no. She was horrified as she gave me a couple of Tylenol.

    Reply
  22. Heidi says

    January 12, 2011 at 6:40 pm

    Wow Esther, that is an amazing story! So scary! I began crying at the point that your husband was driving you to the hospital and then lost it when you said he was sobbing. Praise God that you survived!

    Reply
  23. Heather B says

    January 12, 2011 at 9:00 pm

    I totally don’t even remember this. I feel bad for not being there for you. Esther you are one of those friends that I will love for life.

    Reply
  24. Melissa Hoogendyk says

    January 12, 2011 at 9:10 pm

    I remember you having to go back to the hospital but I don’t think I ever knew how serious it was. I remember Kathy being there and having to take care of the baby and offering to help her. But I wish Jay and I would have known the severity so we could have sat with Jason and been with him. I am so glad you made it through and that Jason and Kathy were there for you, it is such a scarey thing to have to go through after just having your first baby and all the questions that come along with motherhood. God was and is in control and I know you have had some other scares along the way. He is faithful, hallelujah! I thank God for a dear friend like you!

    Reply
  25. EstherIrish says

    January 12, 2011 at 10:12 pm

    They did give me a shot for the pain during the surgery. It was when it wore off that I felt the pain anew. I am in awe of those of you that give birth with no pain killer. Can. Not. Imagine! Yes, my second close call was after I had my third. I do have plans to post that story one of these days! Thanks for asking!

    Reply
  26. Tee says

    January 13, 2011 at 12:16 am

    That must have been so scary, Esther! I’m so glad that your mother in law was willing to bring your daughter up to the hospital and take care of her so that you could continue to nurse!

    Reply
  27. Janet says

    January 13, 2011 at 12:51 am

    I cannot imagine…praise God for protecting you!

    Reply
  28. Anna-Marie says

    January 13, 2011 at 2:31 pm

    I read this post and your mother’s post It must have been an extremely scary time for the whole family. Glad your around to raise your child and the next 3 who came after:)

    Reply
  29. Sonya says

    January 22, 2011 at 10:36 am

    Wow! That is so scary! Thank God you made it through that horrible experience.

    Reply
  30. OneMommy says

    August 12, 2011 at 2:12 pm

    How completely terrifying! I can not imagine how scared you all were. And to be strong enough to not want to go under so you could nurse your little one. Wow.
    God was truly with you when he sent your mother-in-law that day, and that you got there safely.

    Reply
  31. Melissa @ Dyno-mom says

    December 8, 2011 at 9:41 am

    Funny enough it was a frightening near death experience that lead me to start writing. I had internal bleeding after a c-section that was not discovered for five hours and led to a secondary surgery and FIFTEEN units of blood products. Then the remaining blood in my vessels began to produce small clots (this is called DIC) which later traveled to my lungs. Four weeks after giving birth, I was re-hospitalized with a large volume of pulmonary emboli in both lungs. I later needed two surgeries to resolve herniated openings where the incisions for the c-section and the bleeding surgery crossed. Writing gave me something I could do that was productive and made me feel useful again despite the fact that it took a little over a year to be totally back to normal.

    Reply
  32. Fawn says

    January 3, 2012 at 7:26 pm

    My goodness! Having a child is risky business. It’s a good thing we all have a short memory :).

    Reply
  33. Elle (@Cleverlychangin) says

    May 20, 2012 at 10:29 pm

    Wow, what a story. I am glad they were able to stop the bleeding. Writing is so therapeutic. I am glad you enjoy. I enjoyed reading about your experience.

    Reply
  34. Jelli says

    June 4, 2013 at 10:37 pm

    I’m not sure I should’ve been reading this today. Just this a.m. I blacked out at the clinic for my 32 week pregnancy blood tests. After the birth of my 1st child I bled a little more than my midwife would’ve liked, and I’m still struggling with giving all my fears of that same thing happening again to God. So glad you came through alright!

    Reply
  35. Jo Lynn says

    June 4, 2013 at 11:59 pm

    Wow…very glad you made it through all of that. Definitely sounds like the Lord was putting people in place to be sure you made it. Glad to it led you to writing, its such a therapeutic thing.

    Reply
  36. Shell says

    June 5, 2013 at 12:29 pm

    How terrifying!

    Reply
  37. Jacqueline @ Deeprootsathome.com says

    June 5, 2013 at 7:48 pm

    Oh, MY GOODNESS!! I am a surgical nurse and I want to tell you that the Lord spared you!! Thank God for His mercy and for your life. He did a miracle to bring Himself glory!! Beautiful story, Esther!

    Reply
  38. Jacqueline @ Deeprootsathome.com says

    June 5, 2013 at 7:51 pm

    BTW, I am so glad you are sharing from your blog on Wednesday at Deep Roots At Home! I think you will bless and be blessed, too!

    Reply

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Hi! We believe laughter is the best medicine. Join in with us as we share our family laughs, fun with food, and love of travel. Great to meet you! Esther Irish




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