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I Blame It on the Pregnancy

The other day an older lady fell a few feet in front of me.  She hit her head and knee and couldn’t move right away.  I fled the scene in tears.  There were plenty of people there to help her, and I and my kids would have been in the way.  However, I couldn’t help thinking, “What if that was my mom?” and the tears just poured.  I blame it on the pregnancy.

I made a quick trip to the grocery store to get things for Little Jason’s birthday, no big items, but I knew I was out of candles.  When I got home and was putting away the groceries, I looked at the candle I got for him.  Something wasn’t right.  It was a ONE–he’ll be THREE!  I blame it on the pregnancy.

My husband didn’t come home when he said he would, in time to eat and to take the kids to Karate.  I couldn’t get a hold of him at work, and he won’t carry a cell phone.  After hours, I emailed him and asked him if he would call me if he was still at work.  I waited.  I started thinking that he had left rather early that morning and I hadn’t heard from him all day.  I pictured him squashed on the side of the road.  He was gone.  I knew it.  How would I have this baby alone.  How would I get through a funeral?  I cried and cried.  The phone rang.  It was him.  I answered the phone with sobs.  When I  could catch a breath, I accused,  “I was planning your funeral!” Yep, I blame it on the pregnancy.  He had gotten so busy at work that he lost track of time.

Now, I’m still thinking about what I can blame AFTER the pregnancy.  Ideas?

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I’m linked to Works for Me Wednesday.

Esther

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15 Comments Filed Under: Uncategorized Tagged: funny, pregnancy

Comments

  1. Mari says

    October 13, 2011 at 7:21 am

    Uh – the Jason thing? I don’t want to be a spoil sport, but I don’t think that was the pregnancy. And I only say that because I don’t believe this is the first time you’ve planned out your whole life without him in a matter of minutes. In fact, I think we’ve compared notes. HAHA! I’m just sayin’ 🙂

    Reply
  2. bonny says

    October 13, 2011 at 7:45 am

    what do i get to blame it on? motherhood changes the neurons in your brain and they never function the same again… that sounds about right…

    Reply
  3. Hannah says

    October 13, 2011 at 8:19 am

    Seriously! My hubby says I lose more brain cells with each child. Luckily, you’ll have the first three months of ‘recovery’ to use as a blame as well.

    I’m Polish, so that’s my out after that…bummer for the rest of you girls!

    Reply
  4. Frieda says

    October 13, 2011 at 9:20 am

    I love the picture. The expression on your face is priceless, though I’m not quite sure what you were thinking! When I read about the “older lady” falling, I was thinking OLD, not just my age! The last scenario I have been through too many times to count, though my husband does usually carry a cell phone now. Imagine being in a huge city in Mexico and your husband out and about at all hours in heavy traffic on a motor cycle and no phone. That was when I was expecting “guess who”?

    Reply
  5. Dr Momi says

    October 13, 2011 at 10:13 am

    Well, of course you blame it on lots of “kids” after the pregnancy! 🙂 (I used that for years!)

    Reply
  6. katlupe says

    October 13, 2011 at 12:02 pm

    I just stopped by to check on you and this pregnancy. I see it is going well, except for some memory problems. Well, I blame those things on menopause now!

    Reply
  7. Susan Evans says

    October 13, 2011 at 2:44 pm

    We do a lot of wacky things when we’re pregnant… LOL

    Reply
  8. Grumpy Grateful Mom says

    October 13, 2011 at 3:32 pm

    I’m happy your husband is not deceased! I miss having the pregnancy excuse. Now I blame most things on old age, though my husband isn’t buying it. He just thinks I’m crazy. 🙂

    Reply
  9. Anri-Louise Oosthuizen says

    October 13, 2011 at 3:45 pm

    My one friend keeps saying, “I have twelve brothers and sisters”, which she really does. It is her excuse, and her claim to all successes. Mine is “I live in Madagascar.” You can always go for “I am a mother of FIVE!”

    Reply
  10. Elizabeth Grimes says

    October 13, 2011 at 6:10 pm

    Oh, I’ve severely freaked out when I couldn’t get ahold of Eddie and had no pregnancy to blame. 🙂 Don’t be too hard on yourself.

    Reply
  11. Ruth says

    October 14, 2011 at 4:23 pm

    *Smile* I’m sorry you’ve had some rotton moments recently. But thanks for sharing and letting me get my laugh for the day! Yes. I know well those tears. I have them too! But I just get mad when I can’t reach my husband, not worried. So you’re a better wife than I!

    Reply
  12. Rachel says

    October 15, 2011 at 4:21 pm

    After pregnancy it’ll be even better- because then you’ll have one more to “blame” it on! 🙂

    I’ve got seven, and believe me, there are days when I’m sure I’m suffering from early dementia…

    Reply
  13. suzyhomemaker says

    October 19, 2011 at 8:03 am

    This totally made me laugh. I am currently pregnant as well and some of the things that come out of my mouth are crazy. I the commercials I end up crying about, even I don’t understand sometimes. LOL

    Reply
  14. Willa@ArmstrongFamilyFare says

    October 20, 2011 at 12:49 pm

    This made me smile!! After pregnancy you can blame it on sleep deprivation! I’m trying to figure out what I can blame things on now that my baby is sleeping through the night!! 🙂

    Reply

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Hi! We believe laughter is the best medicine. Join in with us as we share our family laughs, fun with food, and love of travel. Great to meet you! Esther Irish




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